It is now the evening of April 6, 2024, and I have finally written my summary at the beginning of the month (not easy, haha). This summary starts with thoughts of Bao, develops around those thoughts, and ends with thoughts of Bao. Interspersed are my graduation project, group meetings, party meetings, teaching assistant work, and weekend hot pot buffets.
March is early spring, but spring in Wuhan is especially short. The few days of spring sunshine have been buried under long hours of sitting in the office. I still miss the happy times with Bao in February; it has only been a little over a month, yet it feels like a lifetime ago. I miss the shaded paths I walked with Bao, the gentle touch of our embraces, and the ice cream we shared. All these memories turn into midnight dreams or daydreams during work, bringing a sense of happiness.
My workdays are from Sunday to Friday, with Saturday off. This schedule will likely continue for a long time, reminiscent of high school, exhausting my muscles, starving my body, and leaving me feeling empty. Yet I can still remain calm; in career or studies, the world is generally like this, with no new happenings. However, finding novelty in the commonplace and creating value from it feels worthwhile. Speaking of work, March was mostly confined to the graduation project and TMA research, with no travel or outings. My entertainment was gaming, with two regular meals a day, and occasionally improving my diet with a buffet. In this situation, I can't help but ask myself whether I truly love this job. With a lingering sense of fog around me, how far can I go? In the fog, I hear a voice saying, "They only know these things are right, but they don't know if they need to do them, because many correct things do not bring joy," leaving me with a sense of confusion. As the saying goes, spring brings drowsiness, autumn fatigue, summer naps, and winter sleep, but one cannot be drowsy all year round. "You must enter through the narrow gate," yet I don't know if there will be desired answers behind it. This is my contemplation outside of work.
Speaking of which, I recall about three years ago when I wrote my first monthly summary. I never thought I would stick with it until today; it adds up to nearly twenty thousand words. If these twenty thousand words could become a graduation thesis... I think that would be nice. In the last semester of my undergraduate studies, there is always a looming deadline that makes one feel a bit uneasy. Perhaps this is the world outside the comfort zone; I must face it bravely. Finally, as agreed, I conclude with those two words: thoughts of Bao.